Growth

Parenting is nothing new in the world. We as a people have been doing it for thousands of years. But why does it seem it takes us a really long time to appreciate it?

Growing up, I like most other children, thought my parents were out of touch and had no clue. Granted, there were times as a child I would say or do something that was completely out of touch with their reality, but on a whole, I viewed them as being a bit "off." Even growing older in my teens and early twenties, my perception of them stayed pretty much the same.

Now, as a parent myself of a thirteen year old son, my eyes are open and I see more than I ever have before. I like to think my wife and I have done a great job with our son and he doesn't look at us the way we did with our parents. But the more I watch him, the more I'm convinced my parents were alright. The more I'm assured that what I perceived as "out of touch parents" was way off base. 

Like my parents, I'm doing everything I can to give my son the best life possible. Sometimes that means working longer or harder and sometimes it means discipline. But in all things, I do everything I can with a sense of love and duty for our son. For a long time I didn't see that in my parents but not because they weren't showing it, but because I refused to see it. They did the best they could with the hand they were dealt and it made me the man I am today. For a long time I tried to not see that, but as I grow a little bit older, I see it now.

It's strange seeing things from a parents eye when for so long it was through the view of being a child. Holding on to those old, immature feelings only gets in the way of a great relationship with my parents and stunts the growth of mine with my son. By recognizing this, I think I've come to a place where I can start to be a little bit more mature in my thoughts and actions and hopefully let those whom I love know how much they mean to me.

Leaders

Leaders

Leaders are those that have the ability to get things done, to inspire others to greatness.

I used to think leaders were the best at their craft.  They were the best sales person, or best at a particular game, or the best at a given sport.  

While training for an annual race I run (the River to River Relay Race) I found myself thinking as I ran up and down hills in the beautiful forest surrounding the lake I use for training.  I questioned my ability to lead our team when I was one of the weaker runners of our team.  

Several of my runners were not "runners" in the classic sense.  They did not run in high school or college.  They were individuals that enjoyed keeping fit and looking for a challenge.  When I approached them about running, they were excited and took to it in a way that helped transform them into "runners" as you might think of.  Now, when we run together, they pull away from me early on in the run and finish way ahead of me.

At first, I was discouraged because I couldn't or wasn't as good as them, and I was the one that invited them to running as more than a fleeting activity.  What I discovered while pushing myself up hills on that warm spring day was that I didn't need to be the best to be our team leader.  I was far from it.  What I did need to have was the ability to encourage others around me to perform at their very best.  What I needed was to have the belief in another person that they could attain something greater, and do the best I could at helping them achieve it.  In this instance, for this team, I became the leader.

Then there are those who think they are a leader when in fact their style, their demeanor might be good for a temporary fix when in the long run amounts to nothing more than being a bully.  These are the ones that assume authority yet do not lead.  Their actions and words are used to bully their way with others.  In the long run, most like this end up alienating those they think they are leading.  

Any good leader is also one of the best followers.  They know what it is to be inspired by someone with a greater vision than themselves.  In turn, they can use this interaction as a foundation to build others up and get them to be leaders in their own right.

Now, I'm not going to say I'm some kind of inspirational speaker or born leader.  What I share is only my revelation of what a leader is or could be.  There are far more qualified people that can and do lead.  

What kind of person inspires the best in you?  What are the qualities you look for in a leader or try to instill in those you lead?

(Almost) Average

Average.  

Somewhere in the middle.  In between great and worthless.  Mediocre.  Average is the "measure of central tendency."

I've been thinking about that for a while.  What makes me "average?"  Who are those members of our society that hold down the polar opposites to make me average?  How many are here with me?

But then again, I'm "almost" average.  I'm not quite dead center.  At times, I lean to the right and yet I have tendencies to the left.  I'm not rich, though far from poor.  

I admire those that have the drive and fortitude to achieve greatness.  It is their attainment of the spectacular that gives hope to us average folk.  I don't envy the problems associated with great wealth or fame or notoriety.  Though I do look to their achievements as marks to reach.  We all need goals to push us beyond what we take comfort in.  When we grab hold of those goals and make them real, we begin to pull ourselves out of mediocrity into the realm of the greater.

I pity those that give in, that have no hope and intentionally repress any and all sense of greatness.  They often have a tendency to desire company and in doing so, are able to pick off the weaker "average" people and bring them down with them.  

In the middle, I face the easy temptation of the lesser path that beckons with boasts of ease and lack of personal responsibility.  I also face the calling of the greater, the force pushing ahead towards a common good for my family and others in my community.  

I face a constant calling from both sides and daily have to decide which path to choose.  I am not alone in my choices, as I lean heavily on my faith to inform my decisions.  So I struggle, but I continue because to stop is giving in to the lesser.

So, with that said, I look for ways to constantly improve.  I look for ways to leave my mark.  I look for opportunities to reach up out of the average and slowly, carefully climb upwards.  Who knows, I just might get there.